So I've been apartment hunting... Nasty business in this city. I hate it.
I was suppose to look at a place today, but then my paranoia kicked in and I completely chickened out. I kept on thinking what an easy target I am.
I step into the building, one person distracts me with candy and another sneaks up behind me with a cloth soaked in chloroform and after a few hours I wake up in a bath tub of ice and some missing organs. (It's usually a kidney, but you never know when they would take half of my liver)
Ugh, I don't know if I should blame it on all the weird movies I've been watching, the fact that I'm South African or that I just don't trust people in general... (Post for another day)
Maybe I should have a set of questions that should be answered.
1. Can you name one use for chloroform?
2. Do you know how to sell organs on the black market?
3. Will you be offended if I bring a black light along to look for body fluids?
4. Do you have any fetishes that are frowned upon?
5. Do you know anything about security surveillance, hidden cameras and bugging?
I'm stopping there, this is freaking me out more...
You are so creating your own spooks!
ReplyDeleteWork through a reputable letting agency, probably one recommended by a friend....
Salagatle!
Yes, I am... It was just too tempting to not write about something like this... C'mon, lets face it, how often do you get to write about organ harvesting and chloroform? Could not let the opportunity pass me by...
DeleteI'm still trying to think about how I can incorporate rabies into a post... maybe I should get attacked by a rabid squirrel...
Oh, rabies is easy - we have a problem here in Gauteng at the moment - so you could link it to a phobia of receiving mail from the family back home which might have been infected.......
ReplyDeleteSalagatle!
Too funny... apart from the rabies problem...
Delete